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Ceremonies

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Description and comparative analysis of the ceremonies of different religions and confessions

Cerimonies

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6.1.3. Wedding
Christians believe that marriage is a gift from God, one that should not be taken for granted. It is the right atmosphere to engage in sexual relations and to build a family life. Getting married in a church, in front of God, is very important.

A marriage is a public declaration of love and commitment. This declaration is made in front of friends and family in a church ceremony.

The history of marriage
Marriage vows, in the form "To have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part", have been recited at UK church weddings since 1552.

But before the wedding service was written into the Book of Common Prayer, marriages were much more informal: couples could simply promise themselves to one another at any time or place and the spoken word was as good as the written contract.

Church of England weddings

Marriage in the Church of England
If you choose to get married in church, there is an added dimension - the assurance that God cares about your relationship and that His resources and strength are available to help you. Including God in your marriage doesn't mean that you will avoid all the usual ups and downs, but you will know that you can look to God for help and guidance and that His love will sustain you. You will also have the support of the Christian Church family.

Your Marriage in the Church of England
Where can couples marry?
A couple may marry in their local Church of England parish church if either the man or woman lives in the parish. Before 2007, they could not be married in another parish unless they had attended church services there for six months and were on its electoral roll.

In July 2007, however, the Church of England initiated a change in the law to make it easier for cou-ples to have a church wedding in a parish other than their own. The changes make it easier for a couple to marry in a church where there is a family or other special connection.

The following are qualifying connections:
  • One of the couple was baptised or confirmed in the parish
  • One of the couple has (at any time) lived there for a period of six months or more
  • One of the couple attended services there for six months or more
  • A parent of one of the couple lived or attended services there for six months or more
  • A parent or grandparent of one of the couple was married there

The meeting of the General Synod on Saturday 7 July 2007 unanimously approved the draft meas-ure. Because the Church of England is the official state church, the measure had to be approved by the Parliamentary Ecclesiastical Committee before going through both Houses of Parliament and receiving Royal Assent. It is expected to become law in autumn 2008.

Before the wedding
Before the ceremony, there are several things the couple must do. Firstly, they must arrange to have their banns (a public announcement of a forthcoming marriage) read out on three Sundays during the three months before the wedding. They must be read out in the parishes of both peo-ple. If the banns cannot be read out for any reason, a special licence can be issued by the bishop of the diocese.

Secondly, the couple must speak to the priest about hymns and prayers they may want on the day. Many couples want to include extra touches, such as flower arrangements or musicians.

Some churches offer marriage preparation, where the priest will discuss subjects such as money, conflict, communication and sex. This throws up possible problems which the couple may come across during their marriage, and helps suggest ideas for handling them.

A Church of England wedding ceremony
The ceremony itself has a fairly uniform order:
  • Beginning the service: the priest welcomes the congregation and then reads out what Chris-tians believe in marriage.
  • Declarations: the couple make their promises in front of God that they will love, comfort, honour and protect their partner as long as they both shall live.
  • Vows: The couple then make their vows to one another:

To have and to hold
from this day forward;
for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer,
in sickness and in health,
to love and to cherish,
till death do us part

Traditional Church of England wedding vows
Rings: The couple exchange rings and say:
With my body I honour you,
all that I am I give to you,
and all that I have I share with you,
within the love of God,
Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

Traditional words for the exchange of rings
  • Proclamation: the priest tells the couple that they are now husband and wife.
  • Prayers: prayers are said for the couple. They may include a prayer for the gift of children, but this is optional.
  • Readings and sermon: there will be some readings from the Bible and the minister gives a sermon.
  • Signing of the register: the bride and groom, along with two witnesses, sign the register, which is a legal requirement. They receive a legally binding marriage certificate.
Pictures

A wedding in the eyes of God is seen as an important rite of passage and to some makes the vows more important.

Videos

Wedding – A video of a traditional Church of England Wedding.

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This project has been funded with support from the European Commission. This web site reflects the views only of the author, and the Commission cannot be held responsible for any use which may be made of the information contained therein.